"Relax, you need time to recuperate. God understands. You're human. You're going to have feelings and emotions to work through. Take it slow, pray, ask God to show you where it began and renounce what you have done to yourself and to others. Let Him start afresh in your life. Let God deal with you first before you go back out into the field. He doesn't expect you to do this immediately. Know that the Holy Spirit is the Comforter. He's your best friend in times of loneliness. Let Him minister to you. Rely on God , and not on man. Shut yourself up with the Lord. Learn the voice of your shepherd. Get back to a balanced life as you feel ready to make new friends in another church or at work. Be careful not to be paranoid or cynical or critical, which are all human reactions to leaving an abusive setting. The healing process can be long or short, but it can't be rushed or controlled. It has to be God that heals for it to be genuine. Learn from your experience. Don't become bitter, but better. Know that you just got a lesson in spiritual discernment, and that you can be used in this way to help others. Let your trials and tribulations be turned around for God's glory, and not let any bitterness or anger overtake you. Know that there are lots of people out there that share your hurt and are willing to help. You are not alone."
I came across this as I was dinking around on the internet, and it comforted me greatly as I have been going through a healing process. Each time God does a little more healing, I am amazed at how He does it and the little things that He does to make me laugh to bring my joy back.
A couple of weeks back after church I told my husband that I shouldn't be even in church I felt like such a hypocrite. I just felt mean and nasty, cranky, I was hurting, in pain both physically and emotionally, and no matter how much I prayed nothing changed. I would bad mouth people. I would cuss (immediately would ask forgiveness, but it was there), I had cuss words flying around in my head just waiting to burst forth, and tear down the person who was there. Thankfully, the Lord has given me self control in that area, and I resisted that temptation. So back to me being a hypocrite. It's those things that I don't want to do, that I do, and so how can I lead others to Christ if I can't even get it right myself, huh?
So, the following Sunday, my pastor, who is totally awesome and real and so down to earth, makes a comment that there may be someone in the congregation who was thinking that they didn't even want to go to church because it was just full of hypocrites anyways (which I wasn't thinking that by the way — just thought I myself was a hypocrite), and my pastor raised his hand and said "I'm a hypocrite." Then he said, we all are hypocrites, but we have room for one more. The Lord brought that comment to my remembrance later that evening as I was spending time with Him, and I literally laughed out loud. I later told my pastor that that little comment he made, brought even more healing to my heart.
I truly am so blessed, and so thankful to the Lord for so many things in my life — I don't ever want to take any of it, or anyone for granted. I love you Lord.