When I came back to Christ on September 4, 2004, it was a long time coming back. I walked away from Him when I was about 14 years old (1984). I had just entered high school. I had been teased from grade school through high school about being a goody two shoes; been teased about being a Christian; been teased because my parents were strict and I wasn’t allowed to do many of the things my friends were allowed to do. So, of course, when my parents gave me the option of choosing to continue to go to church at the age of 14 or not going, I chose not to go. The peer pressure was far too great for me, and I walked away from my Lord and Savior. I turned my back on Him, and denied Him. Proverbs 29:25 “Fearing people is a dangerous trap, but trusting the Lord means safety.”
When I think of that now, it hurts my heart to think of what that must have done to His heart. I instead decided that my way was better. I got caught up in partying and boys, and basically that was my life. I ran that race fast and hard for many years, and I paid a price for it. I wish I would have never done it now. I had bad things happen to me because of my poor choices, I made poor choices during this time of my life, and I really don’t think I was myself. Both of them (men and alcohol) became an addiction.
Even in spite of the life I was leading, God would continue to attempt to get my attention, and continued to pursue me. All the while I continued to do my own thing. As I look back over my life I see His hand in my life. He continued to put people into my life that knew Him, and would tell me more about Him. For many years I would refuse to let anyone talk to me about the Lord. I thought that Christians were wackos and crazy. I now know I was wrong.
It was in about 2001, and I was working for an attorney that did corporate law. I worked three days a week for him. He was a Christian, and his partner was a Christian. He would come into work and spend hours talking to me about the Lord. He answered all my questions, countered all my arguments, and was able to do what no one else had been able to do — get through to me the Truth of Jesus Christ. One afternoon, I knelt in that office and gave my life over to Jesus Christ. John 1:13 “They are reborn — not with a physical birth resulting from human passion or plan, but a birth that comes from God.”
I wasn’t sure what to expect. I had a Bible and my boss got me a good bible study to work on. He also encouraged me to come to church. I told him “that’s not my thing.”
It really is amazing when I look back on it now, the changes that Christ began to make in my life gradually. My life began to fall apart, and it was FAR from perfect. My life needed to be taken apart before it could be rebuilt correctly. Basically, I lost everything. I started at ground zero. The part that I found amazing was that even in the midst of that huge storm, I had amazing peace. Philippians 4:7 “Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.” The real surrender came in 2004. That comes in Part 2. More to come.